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Sunday, September 26, 2004 Lazy as hell. Over the weekend I had an essay to complete, a lit review and some findings to write up. And as of this moment I've only finished the first. And not even quite finished it yet, it needs fine tuning and it's due tomorrow. And I just feel like sleeping, don't feel like doing any of this crap, even though it's important crap that needs to be done like really really soon. Just soooo slack.And my life is completely uninteresting; I feel absolutely uninvolved in school, and I think I've suddenly gone into slow mode when the world around me has hit the fast forward button. I think it's partly for lack of trying on my part, so I have no right to whine. I could get out there and get involved but for some reason I never do. I'm lazy and I hate it but I'm not willing to do anything about it cuz in a way maybe I'm just scared to try something new, that it'll take too much time, that it doesn't sound fascinating enough to give a chance to. So it's all my bad. That sucks to know. I hate my prison of familiarity. And I hate inertia. And I hate angst too. Hahaha, that's pretty funny. Better try to get off my ass and do something. Viv wished for the moon @ 4:45 AM Sunday, September 19, 2004 I don't know why, baby, but everytime after you leave I just feel incredibly empty and alone. When you're here, physically with me, perhaps I take it for granted some. I turn to my book, lean comfortably against your arm as you use my computer, and we can spend up to hours like that. But when you've left then the awful missingness sets in, and I wish so much that you were back with me.That kind of thing, y'know. I love you. Viv wished for the moon @ 7:20 AM Friday, September 17, 2004 Bleah, I'm really sick. Nasty attack of food poisoning has left me down for the count for the last two days...on Wednesday night I puked up just about all of my dinner and then took some medication to ease the stomach. Ironically the subsequent 4 times I went to throw up over the course of the next 4 hours was to barf all the pills right back out. And then from that night up till right now I've been stranded with occasional cramps and persistent diahorrea. It's really really grossing me out loads and I've been on liquid diet since yesterday. All broth and Milo, and even this morning when I woke up with my tummy and intestines feeling much better a slice of bread brought me down again. :(Though I guess I'd rather have diahorrea than puke...it's yucky how vomit surges out your nose and your chest heaves and heaves even though you want to yell "that's enough, I've puked as much as I can stand to already!" I mean, you know what I mean? Okay I think I've fulfilled my Graphic Description Quota for today and I can feel a crap coming. Disappearing right about now. Viv wished for the moon @ 2:20 AM Monday, September 13, 2004 She wiiiiillll... be loooooved... Geezum, the song's stuck in my head today. Been feeling rather lazy about blogging lately. Our Cs105 project about blogs has certainly made me aware of a few things. The most interesting is that people read blogs to find out more about what's happening in the lives of their friends; and people blog to keep friends in the loop. I guess it's true, to some extent. The few rare times I read blogs is for the same reason. But for people looking for information about how my life is I have a feeling my blog is the worst place to look. :P It seems I've pretty much given up writing the details of my day, which is kinda sad because when I look back at my old entries it's been fun to recall the different things I did, even the stuff I don't really remember. It gives me a history of sorts to look back upon. Have I mentioned this before? I think I have...whoops. I guess I've stopped now because most times it seems rather dry to say things like "At 1pm I ate lunch. It was nice. At 1.40 I went to the toilet and sat on the potty while reading Batman: Hush Volume One. Blah blah blah until bedtime." But I realize it's actually stuff like this I enjoy reading off friend's blogs. Not the bits about toilets I mean. I can do very well without knowing details like that. But just how they are, how they're doing.The interview PK and I did with Xiao Zheng on Saturday was pretty significant for me. We interviewed him because he's an ex-blogger (you can check it out anyway in my linkadinks, under Cobra), and we asked him why he started in the first place and why he stopped. I don't know how much to divulge in here but a lot of what he said struck a chord for me. Blog is a great way to keep in touch with people you haven't seen in ages, either because you just drifted, or they're in another country, or whatever. I'll be open here. Olivia used to have a blog and when I found out I did check up on it from time to time. We were great friends once, but somehow things changed so much and from some point we never spoke again. I always wondered how she was, and blog provided a safe way for me to find out, without having to deal with the awkwardness of meeting, chatting on the phone, or even emailing. Yes it's one way, and the person on the other side probably wouldn't ever know you were there (unless he/she's got a tracker but even then ISPs are kinda hard to pin to different people unless you're really really in the know.). But it's sometimes the only way. And strangely enough that's just the reason she closed her blog. She didn't like the idea that people could find out about her without talking to her at all. I guess I can understand it, but it's ironic. The very reason why people tend to read blogs is why she closed hers. Insert profound analysis/conclusion here. But that concludes that. Why do I blog? I do it pretty much to express myself creatively; not just when I'm penning poetry or displaying art, but also through the act itself of writing. I'm just keeping the noggin' well oiled by making sure I don't forget how to write coherently and (somewhat) intelligently (although this is pretty subjective. Nyah, be quiet!)...and I suppose entertainingly as well. I guess the word "entertain" entails, to some extent, amusing an audience. I think I like doing that. If I made you smile at reading this, you just made my day, whoever you are. There ya go, my real-life clown temperment still finds inroads into my online life. Which is pretty much to be expected. Ok I won't deny: I like having an audience. It's like I'm standing on the stage doing front-of-curtain one-scene dramatic acts/comedy before the real play begins. And even though my audience has no face, or is invisible in the darkness, I hear them, I hear them laugh, boo or clap. Through the comments, through the tagboard, through the statcounter, I hear it. And really. I love it. That's, to me, the best thing about blogging. Having people listen as you shout to the world. But das just moi and the ego talking. So tell me, why do you blog? Or why do you read blogs? Do SHOUT OUT and tell me! Okay, so to practice what I preach, here's the details of my day, which luckily was pretty interesting so it makes for some meaty content. Met Karin today, which is probably one of the few last times I'll get to see her before she flies off to the UK on the 25th. Sigh, after the UK lot have left there'll really be nobody left. :( Oh wait, I forgot the boys in NS now...but at some point they'll all be gone too...Brudda, Ho, Hamster, Zhiq...:( :( :( Thus concludes the saga that began about one year ago. :( Karin, I'll miss you loads...first Jan, then you. And then everybody else!! But anyway back to our day. Nasi Lemak lunch at Adam Road food centre and then sinful MUD PIE from Island Creamery. I gotta tell you, this mud pie is...like...WHOA. And I mean WHOA. It's craaaazy...chocolate crust and layers of coffee, vanilla and reverso (chocolate with oreo pieces) ice-cream, smothered in oreo debris...and...and...oh wow...ooh...aah...AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! CAN YOU SAY ORGASMIC SUGAR RUSH???????? Er...sorry, you shouldn't've heard that. ^^;; Okay delete off the adjectives and you'll be okay. But really, I recommend it highly if you're in the calorie cramming mood. Even if you're not you certainly will chuck such sentiment out the window once you set eyes on this baby...I chose to ignore the fact that I'd already eaten fried chicken with coconut rice and dived in. Boy...*looks guilty* But wow...great stuff. So Karin and I worked off the guilt by walking all the way back to my house from Serene Centre, and then we spent the whole afternoon swapping mp3s and she riffled through my CD collection for stuff to rip. Hurray for technology! So now I've got a tummy full of chocolatey goodness and 3 CDs of burned songs. Norah Jones, Daft Punk and otha miscellany. And some happy memories and photos to keep till you come back next year. :) *hugs Karin* Thanks dearie, today was great. All the fascinating gossip and cartoon and music and Monty Python goodness. Happy listening to new CDs! And one final thing... YOU HAVE TO COME BACK NEXT YEAR, WOMAN! YOU AND JANICE! *evil eyes both of them* All in all, a happy day for me, although got very little work done. Oh yeah, did I remember to say that now I'M ON ONE WEEK BREAK, BABY??? But I'm still busy, so poo. :( Hopefully will still find time for fun and happiness and sparkly rainbows. Whee! I'm still on sugar high. Those mud pies are some strong stuff. :D :D :D I have Maroon 5 swimming in my head. The She Will Be Loved MTV is soooo wrong though. Think Stacy's Mom minus some degree of slutty dancing and make the singer and Stacy like, 10 years older. There you go. SO WRONG!! Check out the MTV at Yahoo!Launch and sign in with your Yahoo! user name. Don't have one? Dude/dudette, you're missing out. GET ONE! I've been doing an awful lot of uppercapslocking eh? So shouty! Oh well. GOOD NIGHT, SWEET WORLD!!!!! *MUAHS* (and of course, a special MUAH for a special person! Miss you much, baby!) Viv wished for the moon @ 6:47 AM Wednesday, September 08, 2004 Silence. Feeling remarkably insipid right now, slipping into ennui. Not quite sure what to do. I have some stuff to do for Sunday School but I just feel so...nothing-ful. Y'know, nothing-ful? Fulla nothing? Something like that. Or anything.At this juncture I just deleted off a whole chunk of whining I realized was getting officious and self-righteous. In a nutshell, the culture of silence that always descends upon any one of our lectures or tutorials is starting to get to me lots. I know sometimes I'm a part of it, and I dislike it immensely. Are we so lacking in intellectual curiousity, ideas, zest to learn, that we must go silent, conspirators in our apathy? Why? And the feeling of being stranded once more bobs to the surface, and looks me in the eye. And I wonder when I made the decisions I don't remember making. In other news, dad back safely from the USA. Viv wished for the moon @ 6:39 AM Sunday, September 05, 2004 Rain.Just a little one piece I did in like 4hours (considerably longer than I thought it would take.). While I like how the last 2 panels turned out I really hate the first one, it looks like crap but I am really going cross-eyed staring at the computer so I've let it be. If you get the joke please tell me. If you don't get it, also tell me. I think my sense of humour leaves a little something to be desired... Done entirely on PS 6. 
Having gastric. Urgh! And I need to pee. And I feel guilty for having burned a good weekend yet again. :( Viv wished for the moon @ 8:43 AM Friday, September 03, 2004 Art.Hip hip hurrah for Open Canvas 1.1, even if it's all in Japanese and I couldn't understand half of what I was clicking! At least it takes up waaay less space than Open Canvas V3 or Painter. So whee! 
And wheee! 
All I can say is... THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY! *Slumps over in a stupor and goes to sleep* Whee. Viv wished for the moon @ 9:08 AM |
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 Thing of the day
Head in the clouds Vivienne Wong was hatched on the 12th of June 1985 and hails from Singapore, which contrary to popular belief, is not a colony of Japan. Formerly of Raffles Girls' Primary and Secondary School and then of Hwa Chong Junior College's Humanities Scheme, she is currently readjusting herself to the finer points of academia (read: she hasn't studied in ages and is really overworked) in her 2nd year at Nanyang Technological University Communication Studies. However she is currently spending the semester on the snowy plains of Ithaca College, New York, and lovin' it. Otherwise, she likes talking about herself in the third person, drawing, acting, comics, watching cartoons, eating Italian food, light rock, Irish music, Broadway tunes, acoustic guitar riffs, drawing some more and singing loudly in the bathroom. On the other hand, she dislikes unmotivated people, afternoon naps, the conventional, and people who are either smelly or wearing clothes too tight for them so that they end up bulging. Contactable here.
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